I can point to events and moments that shaped, guided, and created something new in me – a core memory if you will. Aihara Sensei asking me if I wanted to be an ALT or a teacher, drawing a house on the moonroof of the blue Dodge Shadow as Kari and I looked up at the stars at Lake Arcadia, becoming a father…twice…being fired from OC on August 9th so donors could feel comfortable who was on campus, March 12th, 2020 when a meeting was had to close our schools because of a virus, and recently, the Robb Elementary school shooting on May 24th, 2022 where 19 children were sacrificed at the altar of gun rights.
Watching testimony today from Mr. Reyes, the teacher that was shot two times and survived, created a visceral response in me. Watching him apologize to parents, administrators, and the public that he did all he could to protect these children brought such anger in me. In that moment, that moment of such pain, loneliness and trauma for Mr. Reyes, I was guided to a new core memory – apathy.
Apathy is the secret to happiness. It is not fulfillment, purpose, ability to make a difference, or money. It is apathy. To be unconcerned with the all that is happening around me, yet be in the moment with my family is what will bring about happiness. So, today, listening to Mr. Reyes apologize that the years of training, preparation, and dedication to his craft was not enough, I no longer have hope for education. I no longer believe education is the great equalizer. I no longer believe education to serve students and society. I no longer believe education to make a difference. I no longer believe education matters beyond wealth building. And I no longer believe education is my path.